Who has not ever felt unlucky in love? With no luck, fate, or chance to bring joy to your heart? Sometimes it happens that this lasts longer than we would like and plunges us into a kind of vicious circle in which we think that each time it is worse, that the dates will be a failure over and over again, and we end up getting sad and filling us with negativity.
But it’s all part of your learning process, don’t forget that! Therefore, so that you remember what is important and return to your core, in this note we will tell you what things you should not forget if you are feeling unlucky in relationships.
unconditional love is you
Movies and fairy tales have created for many of us the idea that love is unconditional, something that works forever and that it comes on a slender horse or is hidden in a tower. But real love is complex, it has flaws and above all, it is built on a relationship, side by side.
You cannot spend time thinking about that love without investing that energy in something that comes first: you! That really is an unconditional love, forever and as faithful as you want. But just like any other, it must be fed, nurtured, grown. Therefore, if you are alone, do not punish yourself, take this time for yourself, discover what you like, explore what things make you feel good, get to know yourself, accept yourself, heal yourself. Only that path, the one that takes you to you, will be the one that later leads you to another.
Old wounds need to be healed
Many people fear loneliness because being alone brings us face to face with our deepest and oldest fears and anxieties. That is why there are couples who are together but are unhappy, because there is something they seek to “cover” with their relationship. But if you don’t want this, if you want a partner who does you good, you should encourage yourself to uncover your wounds. We all have them, and we need time to heal. Take it because it will be time invested in you, valuable and very rewarding. Because it will make you look for someone later not from necessity, but from desire, which is something very different.
Reinvent yourself as many times as necessary
Don’t be scared by the changes or let frustration or anxiety win you because things don’t turn out the way you want or you find yourself with the same “stone” over and over again. Sometimes it is necessary to make mistakes again so that learning takes hold and we can accept it. Remember that the universe will bring us over and over again what we need to evolve until we cannot accept the learning it brings.
Don’t look outside
A very common mistake of those who say they feel unlucky in love is to look outside, in others, for what they have not worked on on a personal level. Thus, we hope that the other “makes us happy”, “motivates us”. Everything you need is within you! A partner can accompany you, hug you, accept you, and encourage you, but you have to do it with yourself first. Otherwise, you will always be placing your expectations of yourself on your partner.
everything is a mirror
Remember that everything that others return to you, even what annoys you, for example: lack of commitment, lack of appreciation… They are yours! It is difficult to see it that way, but I assure you that once you do it you will understand that you have the power and not the other. You can change your reality by starting to think better of yourself. If you see in others a lack of commitment, for example, ask yourself what happens to you with that. You will surely find more answers than you think.
don’t punish yourself
It’s great that you can work on yourself to change things in your relationships, but don’t go overboard and end up constantly punishing or blaming yourself. Remember: we are all in constant learning. What is life if not that? Well then, on the contrary, hug yourself more strongly, accept yourself and accompany yourself because you are living your own growth. And that will always be something to celebrate!
You can learn from love
There are two ways to learn: from love or from pain. If you think things are going wrong for you in your relationships, remember that you can and deserve to learn from love. Repeat this to yourself as many times as you need to get rid of the idea that couples always come up with something that makes you feel somehow bad.