Ever since I was little I always liked men. It was something that I never questioned, I just adopted it as my own.
When I grew up, it was the same. Boyfriend from here, boyfriend from there. It would never have occurred to me to be with a woman. But yes, I was.
I was because a child-like curiosity was awakened within me to try what I always learned was “not for me”. But not as a question of adolescent rebellion, because I’m almost 40 years old and I’m not at all.
I just think it’s part of a deconstruction process that I’ve been in for a few years; a process that I feel also has a social echo in the feminine strength that we are showing to the world.
We are encouraging ourselves to be. As if suddenly something had woken us all up, contagiously, quickly and profoundly.
That’s how my being with a woman came about, with Lila, a friend with whom we share that same curiosity. And we got ready to experience it together, almost as if we were children, but with the conscience and respect of two adults.
The experience was just that, an experience. Today I am in a relationship with a man whom I love, but I feel that she could have been Lila too.
Because being with a woman made me blow up many of my preconceptions and make my structures more flexible.
That’s why Today I want to share with you some things I learned from being with another woman..
People are not defined by their gender
Each of the people I liked in life is beautiful for something very particular, not because of their gender. I could love a man like today, or love a woman. Being with Lila helped me understand that for love there is no gender, there are people with a heart. It’s that simple.
Sexuality can expand (even towards myself)
Being with Lila made me practice my own relationship with my body, too. Prove how much I know myself, how much I still have to know myself. Also, it helped me to know that there are other ways to explore sexuality, even with myself. Not everything is known. There are other ways to feel pleasure.
Jealousy and comparisons are meaningless
How many times before Lila I saw other women thinking about what I lacked, comparing me. Being in bed with another woman made me take that veil off her, see her just like me, perfect in its imperfection. And joyful, because, and I also take that with me, women have the right to enjoyment. And we shouldn’t be ashamed.
Not everything can be tagged.
Especially with Lila I learned that labels lie. People cannot be pigeonholed. I could not say that I am “this” or “that”. But, without a doubt, I feel more receptive, perceptive and less prejudiced of having experimented instead of criticizing, that when love arrives and in any way, it is always welcome.