This article is based on an interview with a former OnlyFans content creator. The person asked not to be named to protect their identity, but Business Insider has confirmed their income and former job. The text has been edited for length and clarity.
When I turned 18, I did something that I thought it would help me feel empowered as a woman, But instead it left me traumatized: I joined OnlyFans. I only spent 3 years as a content creator on the platform, but looking back, they were the most miserable years of my life.
At the time, joining OnlyFans seemed like a natural progression. I was already posting bikini photos on Instagram, so there didn’t seem to be a huge difference between posting photos there and posting them on OnlyFans.
I saw other creators talking about how OnlyFans made them feel empowered and in charge of their own lives. I wanted that too and I was fine with it. But The reality of what happened was nothing like what they described.
My OnlyFans subscribers were constantly pushing my limits
During my time as an OnlyFans creator, I was more depressed and anxious than ever. I was making a lot of money — a lot of money, actually, an average of up to €18,500 a month — but I felt like My subscribers were constantly asking me for more, pushing my limits.
No matter what I posted, they wanted more explicit content. I ended up sending nude photos several times, even though I didn’t really want to, because I felt a lot of pressure and they also offered me a lot of money. On top of that, I was getting horrible messages that were very degrading and I didn’t see any filtering system on OnlyFans to block them.
It was obvious that They saw me as an object for their pleasure and not as a person. It was horrible to be constantly sexualized to such a dehumanizing level.
OnlyFans users spent more than €5 billion last year and the number of content creators increased by 47%
I was miserable and spent money to hide my depression and anxiety
Even though he earned a lot of money, he spent it as quickly as he got it, but It was a mechanism to hide my depression and anxiety. I got used to a luxurious lifestyle where I traveled to beautiful places to shoot content in new environments. I kept thinking: maybe this is the trip where I’ll be happy. But it was never true. I always felt miserable.
My family and friends wanted me to stop, but they couldn’t control me. It was something I couldn’t stop overnight.
My whole life revolved around creating content for OnlyFans
I didn’t grow up with a lot of money. As a child, I was made fun of for having a beat-up car and a small house. I think that instilled in me the desire to make money as an adult and prove myself. I thought money would be the answer to all my problemsbut it was not so.
OnlyFans seemed like a path to self-sufficiency to me, and for a while it was. The money was good, but it changed my life. I started to isolate myself because of depression and I lost the closeness I had with my family. My friendships began to suffer because I avoided my friends.
My whole life revolved around creating content and talking to my subscribers. I spent at least 2 hours a day messaging subscribers and it took a few hours to record and edit the content. It was a full-time job. I was spending at least 8 hours a day doing all this and it was exhausting.
There came a point where the money wasn’t worth it.
I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I was so young and naive that I didn’t see the repercussions of posting sexy photos. And once I did, I thought there was no reason to stop, because the photos were already out there.
I felt awful. All the creepy attention was making me sick. Subscribers kept asking me for nude photos and offering me more and more money. I found myself overstepping my boundaries and felt like there was no other way out than to end it all at once.
To be honest, I was close to ending my life. I couldn’t live with myself and I constantly felt on the verge of a mental breakdown. My life was spiraling and I needed help.
Although I grew up in a Christian home, I had lost sight of my faith, but a family member noticed I was spiraling and prayed for me. And through that prayer, I found my way back to Jesus.
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I found the strength to leave OnlyFans thanks to faith
I don’t think I could have left it all on my own, but I have found strength through my faith in Jesus. Now I know there is a purpose for my lifeI think I went through what I went through so I could have a platform to share my story with other girls who are going through the same thing, which is what I’ve done in the TikTok videos where I detail my experiences.
Now I’m trying to find a new life and I’ve radically changed my relationship with social media to create a career that I am proud of. I’m ready to move on, without OnlyFans.
Editor’s note: An OnlyFans spokeswoman sent the following statement to Business Insider:
“OnlyFans is designed to allow creators to connect with their fans in a safe environment behind a paywall. Creators retain ownership of all of their content and if a creator decides to leave the platform they can close their account and delete all of their content at any time. Additionally, all creators have the power to block or report users who behave inappropriately and we take additional action when necessary.”
If you or someone you know is suffering from depression or has had thoughts of harming or killing themselves, seek help. Talk to a family member, friend, or someone you trust. Also, You can call 024where they can help you if you feel like you can’t take it anymore.
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