Every day, humans face situations that can cause discomfort or sadness, it is important that we learn to identify them both in ourselves and in others, in order to help each other. It can be something more serious or something that seems ephemeral, like the result of a football match, but in any case we may need a friend to smile back.
To help our friends, we must listen carefully
4 ways to lift a friend’s spirits:
Let him know that you are available
Listen to him: One of the most important things you can do for someone who is going through a difficult situation is to listen to him. It doesn’t matter if it seems serious to you or not. Listening will show your friend that you care and that you pay attention to what he says. Listening attentively shows interest.
Let your friend know that you are someone they can call at any time of the day or night. Sometimes your friends will lean on you, and other times you’ll be the one leaning on them.
Ask open-ended questions: Don’t jump straight into talking about your experiences, but instead ask your friend questions about their experience. If your friend is talking to you about a breakup, you can ask him how he feels and what he needs from you.
To start, you could ask “How do you feel?” and “Can I do something for you?”
Physical contact
Touch helps convey to your friend that you are there for him and that he is safe with you. However, you should keep in mind that before offering physical comfort to your friend, consult him, he may not like this type of contact.
A hug can be very helpful. If your friend is uncomfortable with touch, you could help them with a pet, as animals can provide great comfort, and in many cases, people feel safe petting a dog or cat.
It is better to empathize and not pity: You must understand what your friend feels and convey to him that you are involved in his pain along with him.
distract your friend
Go for a walk: Sometimes a change of scenery can be helpful in distracting your friend from their current situation. Walking helps to see other environments, it is proven that doing physical activities causes us to produce serotonin, the so-called happiness hormone.
Watch movies: Movies and TV shows can be a great way for your friend to take his mind off his problems, even for a little while.
It is best not to watch sad movies. Try to keep the situation light and pleasant.
Do something new together: Doing something new and unusual becomes a distraction and can increase happiness, as it means your friend has to think about the new activity instead of focusing on what’s bringing him down.
Let your friend know that they can count on you
Avoid common mistakes
Let your friend live his sadness: Avoid saying things like “Cheer up,” especially if he’s suffering from depression or anxiety. If you tell someone to “cheer up,” what you’re doing is focusing more on yourself than on your friend and telling him that your discomfort with his sadness is more important than his sadness itself. It is important to experience emotions, even if they are unpleasant.
Avoid telling someone how they should feel, as everyone has the right to feel and express their emotions.
Don’t avoid your friend: It’s often hard to help a friend through difficult times, but you don’t need to say anything more than “I’m so sorry. I’m here if you need anything.”
know your limits
Take care of yourself: If your friend’s situation makes you feel overwhelmed, you may need to take a break, as being another person’s constant emotional support can also be exhausting. Try not to be his only source of support.
Identify when you should encourage your friend to seek professional help: Sometimes people are unable to deal with emotions and events on their own, in which case, as a friend, you may want to recommend that your friend seek professional help .
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