By Daniel Colombo
It’s a reality: With the 24/7 news cycle and Internet access at our fingertips, it’s easy for events to catch us off guard.
While we cannot control what happens in environments outside of our own or in other parts of the world, we can take steps to keep ourselves as resilient and strong as possible.
Resilience is a resource that human beings have, and encompasses a number of different abilities that allow us to cope with life’s ups and downs and challenges.
So you may not be able to prevent bad things from happening, but what you can do is prepare to deal with bad news when it comes.
15 ways not to make your life bitter with the news
If you want to learn not to get bitter unnecessarily, and even less, with the cuts of reality that we see in the media and networks and the unnecessary worry that you allow them to generate in your mind, here are fifteen practical ways:
- 1 – Do not dwell on bad news: limit it as much as possible
If something tragic has happened, take a few minutes to reflect on what you have learned from it. It is inevitable that painful emotions appear, although we do not always need to sit on that emotion to suffer more, on purpose.
Decades ago, in one of the trainings of my profession as an executive coach, I learned that we are not responsible for the messages that reach us; although we are fully responsible for what we allow those messages to do within the mind.
When something tragic happens, the suggestion is that you live the emotions, do not repress them, and at the same time, that you put the situations in context, and see what you can learn from it.
In the event that it is negative news that affects you directly, for example, when a loved one dies, it is possible to feel it with all the intensity that arises. At the same time, learn something about yourself by thinking about how it influenced your life. Also, use that internal tribute that you will make to project it into the future, for example, how you can be a better person for the others who come after you.
You may also be interested in: 5 Adaptive Intelligence ideas to adapt more quickly without suffering in the attempt
- 2 – Learn from the good news
Bad news often gets all the attention, but we should also be on the lookout for good news. They may be a bit more subtle than bad news, because the media and social media tend to focus more on the negative in the world.
The proportion in the press is approximately 75% negative news and 25% positive.
Faced with this reality, which does not depend on you, have discernment and critical thinking: this is something that only you and no one else can do.
Therefore, if something good has happened, focus on paying attention. You will find out about everything bad in the world anyway; and the information will come to you. It is not about remaining uninformed, but about not suffering for things over which you have no control.
Good news works as an emotional compensatory element because it reminds us that not everything in life is a tragedy.
You can follow accounts on social networks and contributory news portals, instead of letting yourself be invaded by the prevailing negativity; without this meaning that you live in a bubble.
- 3 – Eliminate news consumption as much as possible
Without separating or isolating yourself, one way to not make your life miserable is to limit your consumption of news as much as possible, if it affects you.
By doing so you will be clearing your mind of negative aspects over which -generally- you have no control.
Those patterns of negativity then manifest themselves, without you realizing it, in the form of criticism, judgment, irony, bad humor, or opinions that you make based solely on what someone said or what you heard out there. Although perhaps few people take the time to really investigate: they believe what they say in the media, and you even give credibility to people who supposedly know more than you.
The suggestion here is that you have discernment: analyze, investigate and form your own opinion.
- 4 – Start with the good news in your world
There is an area where you do have all the influence, and it is your life, your family, friends, work and relationships.
If you focus on creating greater well-being, fulfillment and serenity in these spaces, very soon you will begin to balance the not so positive charge that is present in the world in general.
For example, many people grieve over a war thousands of miles away—which is excellent—even though they don’t record or resolve the war they have with their partner or family. How about starting to pacify the most direct environment, and then, project that same way of solving things to all environments?
A practice to try is to project a thought of balance and peace in the face of any disturbance you may witness, your own or others. This simple act, which is born from a complex process in the brain and mind called “thinking” instead of reacting automatically, makes a significant impact, even if you don’t see it instantly.
- 5 – Find ways to de-stress
When things go wrong, the chances of stress multiply; and when this happens you are more likely to make bad decisions.
Stress hormones (especially cortisol) flood your brain, and this can cause you to act without thinking, impulsively and consume too much of everything, even if you fall into an addiction.
To make correct and well-informed decisions, it is necessary to calm down a bit, think and reflect.
When you’re feeling anxious about something, exercise is a great way to de-stress. Running or swimming are good examples of physical activities that calm you down. If you are stressed by work or studies, you can also try something as simple as taking a break from your routine.
Regular practices of yoga, nature walks, physical exercise, meditation, and mindfulness have been shown to be appropriate for reducing cortisol levels in the body and relieving stress.
- 6 – The negative of the world means that something is changing
Although it may not seem like it, when a polarity of excessive simultaneous negativity manifests itself in many aspects of the world in which we live, such as market crashes, natural disasters, pandemics, and massive job cancellations, for example, it is because there is an invisible movement. below that is wanting to emerge.
You may or may not believe at this point; What is certain is that nothing will ever be the same again. I assure you that we are millions of people advocating for a more balanced world.
Situations of uncertainty and the discomfort of change can be the ones that drive you to become aware of all the good and contributing things that you already have in your life, and want to expand it.
So it is not just about eliminating the bad, but about doing more positive actions to compensate and even overcome them.
Another surprising note! What does feel to die? Scientists find answers to this existential question
- 7 – Take time for yourself
Being resilient means being able to set aside time for your daily obligations and duties. This may seem simple and obvious, but in reality it is crucial for the well-being of any person.
Mark in your diary “A little time for me”: it is important to maintain balance and sanity.
There are several ways to incorporate time for you into your life. You can turn off your phone, take active technology-free breaks at work—for example, taking five minutes to breathe with your eyes closed—and take a walk outside. Also, read some non-academic material, connect with a hobby that relaxes you, or be with your pets.
Those moments, added together, are worth much more than an emotional outburst due to the bad news in the world, because you will stimulate your brain to generate more serotonin, endorphin, dopamine and oxytocin, the well-being hormones.
- 8 – Do not take anything personally
There are people who take everything to heart, even when there are distant events over which they have no influence.
One technique that will help you is to instantly ask yourself: “Is this issue something that I can resolve or does it have to do directly with me?” If the answer is yes, act accordingly and fix it. If the answer is no, avoid giving him your power, starting with your mind.
- 9 – Empathic yes, ecpathic no
Ecpathy is an excess of empathy; for example, when you get too involved in the feelings of others, and it hurts you. You mimic yourself so much in what happens to others, that you practically merge your feelings.
Learn to disassociate that what the other person lives belongs to him: it does not mean selfishness or indifference. It means that an appropriate dose of empathy will allow you to better understand and accompany people.
If you live in a permanent overdraft of this aspect of emotional intelligence, the only thing you will achieve is plunge into a spiral of negativity, and you will not be able to help others assertively.
- 10 – Build your support network
When bad things happen in the world, it can help to have a support network of people you can talk to. Whether it’s a friend, family member, or professional counselor, finding someone to talk to when things are tough is a great way to stay grounded.
It is not necessary to share the same experience, because what you are looking for is listening and understanding; That’s why it’s helpful to have someone to commiserate with and convey your concerns about world events.
For example, if you’re going through a major transition, such as a change in career or family structure, it’s important to have someone you can talk to when things get tough.
- 11 – Learn to dissociate
“First take care of yourself, to be able to take care of others.” This maxim from the American educator John Roger teaches us that it is difficult for us to serve as support for others if we are entangled in their same emotional earthquake.
The dissociation technique is that you can share what you feel, without having to get involved.
To achieve this, you can use different perspectives of perception, with your creative imagination, to know that you are you, and the other person is another. And that, if you dissociate (separate) a little from the prevailing emotion, you will be able to observe details in perspective that will allow you to accompany with compassion and assertiveness.
- 12 – Faced with the bad in the world, have healthy habits
“Mental worry takes power in your head, and decreases the power of influence, because you put yourself in a reactive position,” explains writer and leadership specialist Stephen Covey.
This means that to continue living you need to expand your circle of influence: the ability to positively influence situations, instead of staying in the zone of excessive concern. Act, move, see what worries you so much and if that helps or limits you to move forward.